Supporting Non-Duality and Awakening in Asheville and Beyond
PREDATOR AND PRAY
© 2009 Howard McQueen
I was having dinner last night with a sixty plus year old male friend, who is currently without a female partner. He was reminiscing about how capable he has been throughout his life wooing women into the sack. Sometimes, he said, giving them a tight French braid is the clincher. And he ran on into his memories about the various enchantments that worked best.
As his side of the conversation wound down, I slipped in and said “And it’s not like you were behaving like a predator”.
His head snapped up and, looking into his eyes, I could see the awareness that he knew that I was on to his gigolo game and, for the record, so was he. Within myself (and for the record) I notice that I've met again my own old acquaintance in hearing these habits of his so aptly spoken.
We spoke about a lady he had just met at a counseling session. He was very attracted to her, surprisingly, in a much more holistic way than his normal profile match. As we talked, I saw him soften and this quite sacred side shining through. He wanted a deeper more thorough relationship, something to bring new practices and awareness to.
Guys like to roll out the big fireworks up front.
What an interesting perspective, to instead be natural, open and vulnerable, and let that be your calling and trump card. Add to that a willingness (and maturity) to hold back the fireworks for a future time when, perhaps, the relationship would benefit from a bit of snap, pop, and sizzle. Opening up to a spiritual partnership, and in doing this, stepping boldly forth out of past habitual behaviors and forming new ground, one built upon vulnerability, one built upon honestly communicating whatever is being felt, in the awareness of whatever is arising.
Be true first and foremost to yourself in whatever is arising.
Perhaps then, our relationship with Self and with others will enjoy a fullness in truth.
And when it is then decided that the (romantic, business, etc.) qualities of relationship
have been served and is at an end,
we part as knowing each other a good bit more deeply,
and remain true as friends.
~ ~ ~
I was having dinner last night with a sixty plus year old male friend, who is currently without a female partner. He was reminiscing about how capable he has been throughout his life wooing women into the sack. Sometimes, he said, giving them a tight French braid is the clincher. And he ran on into his memories about the various enchantments that worked best.
As his side of the conversation wound down, I slipped in and said “And it’s not like you were behaving like a predator”.
His head snapped up and, looking into his eyes, I could see the awareness that he knew that I was on to his gigolo game and, for the record, so was he. Within myself (and for the record) I notice that I've met again my own old acquaintance in hearing these habits of his so aptly spoken.
We spoke about a lady he had just met at a counseling session. He was very attracted to her, surprisingly, in a much more holistic way than his normal profile match. As we talked, I saw him soften and this quite sacred side shining through. He wanted a deeper more thorough relationship, something to bring new practices and awareness to.
Guys like to roll out the big fireworks up front.
What an interesting perspective, to instead be natural, open and vulnerable, and let that be your calling and trump card. Add to that a willingness (and maturity) to hold back the fireworks for a future time when, perhaps, the relationship would benefit from a bit of snap, pop, and sizzle. Opening up to a spiritual partnership, and in doing this, stepping boldly forth out of past habitual behaviors and forming new ground, one built upon vulnerability, one built upon honestly communicating whatever is being felt, in the awareness of whatever is arising.
Be true first and foremost to yourself in whatever is arising.
Perhaps then, our relationship with Self and with others will enjoy a fullness in truth.
And when it is then decided that the (romantic, business, etc.) qualities of relationship
have been served and is at an end,
we part as knowing each other a good bit more deeply,
and remain true as friends.
~ ~ ~
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